Sunday, June 27, 2004

eunice noticed that i havent been going for service the last few weeks.
well i did go last sunday, but then again it doesnt really help my track record.
as mark told on me, it takes yang more than several phone calls to get me up on sundays.
even if i do wake up, i just plop right back to sleep, after pretending to be awake just to get yang off the phone.
if there was really a desire to go for service, i wouldnt go right back to sleep. right?
yeah well.
i have no movtivation at all to go for church.
in between service and youth, and after youth i stand in the empty space of the recreation hall and wonder who i could talk to, and who would even bother to converse with me.
i stand alone and feel so out of place, unfit, and like a pariah.
and there every week i wonder what i am there for.
then it hits me that the reason i should have that i am there for is to listen to god.
and not to have a sucessful socialising.

C at 6:19 PM |
------ Saturday, June 26, 2004

my dad says the portugal vs england match is his nightmare.
so when i switched channels to channel 5, it was encore telecasting the match. hahaha. and my dad asked if i was watching, and excused himself from the living room. 'my nightmare. i cant bear to watch. dont talk bout it'
hahahaha. im not really watching cause i know the score, but im keeping it on purely for comic relief. hahahah.
anyways. i woke up at eight this morning to head down to town. i was the only 'double beep' on the bus, meaning, i was the only student!
i was in town by 9.10am. imagine that. NINE.TEN AM!
and the reason? the major mango sale.
-dryly. not my idea, cheryl's.
so i wait for less than ten mins and got into shaw's mango. it was a total madhouse. every lady for herself. turns out it opened at 8 instead of nine. the horrors!! then cheryl and i decided to head to wisma's outlet.
cheryl practically dashed there in her heels. hahahaha. desparation. but it was much much better at wisma, no doubt everyone was in a flurry, but they were much more civilised than at shaw.
i was in there from 9.30 till 12. and got bout eighty bucks worth of stuff.
left town early too. bout 3?
my tutor cancelled on me. again. and she's leaving for europe two days before my paper.
snort. im gonna flunk real bad. honestly.
quite upset bout it. she bailed on me so many many times.
wth. first she cancelled. then next she said it was too late, even though it was the exact time. now she's disappeared. im so frustrated im bout to cry.

C at 12:03 AM |
------ Thursday, June 24, 2004

i went to sentosa today to get a tan.
and also of course to have fun with my darlings cs, sarah, py and yf.
i did ended up enjoying myself but am red and blotchy now.
oh wells. haha. we dug a hole so deep we got water, and an awesome sandcastle with volcanoes!
then we went to heeren's marche and stuffed our faces and took a neoprint.
i almost fell asleep on the way home. and i even have to get my ass back to town by 9 tml. towning is pooping. hahaha.
anyways. know the word 'dao'?
i received an email from a friend recently, and in it, he used 'dow'.
hahaah. so it would mean cow=cao, town=toan.
and a sentence for example would be like 'a cao went to toan to get a lown but it fell daon'.
hahahahah. ok.
maybe im the only one amused by it.
and my cousin's staying over!!! little bonnie.
she's been watching snoopy for the entire night and is sooooo entranced by it, to the point where i think its funny. i have been laughing at poor little puzzled bonnie for almost half an hour.
haha.

C at 10:16 PM |
------

:) i saw eunice's blog.
i have a alias, and am otherwise known as dorm mistress of room 3446.
ahahahaha.
i remember how silly keith would ACTUally go 'permission to enter dorm 3446 to retreive laptop for uploading of photos mdm?'
and i would put on a mock stern face and go 'later lahhhh keith. chill and have some snacks'.
hahahahhahahaa.
and refuse him another 3 more times before i say yes.
i loved being evil then.

C at 10:15 PM |
------ Wednesday, June 23, 2004

i havent studied since the june hols started.
my math tutor hasnt appeared the whole week too, due to some messy situation.
my chem tutor, has been mia since the first week of june.
so im left all alone for my midyrs. which effectively starts on monday, with chinese.
cant wait.
and the (physically) lame monster in my house just downed HALF of the carton of juice i was to bring tml to sentosa.
now im kinda fuming mad.
or just venting some pent-up anger.
i cant stand it!
and last night i dreamt bout tbs. shudder. it was a nightmare, no doubt bout it.
i love marykate olsen though.
she's anoxeric and gorgeous!

C at 8:54 PM |
------ Tuesday, June 22, 2004

last night was great. cheryl, emileen, kheng, kenny and me went out for dinner.
kheng was giving me a hard time in the cab, but dinner was fun and yummy.
kenny had to break a glass, and there was shards of glass everywhere, and an entire glass of ice water was on my lap. that little ass even had the cheek to stand behind me and ask if i peed in my pants. haha.
then we carried on to nydc for dessert where sweet emileen ordered a candle on the mudpie for me! haha. and they sang the birthday song for me. oh and i found a glass shard and an icecube in my bag and another shard on my head.
and then we patrolled holland for a while before ending up in starbucks.
haha. basically we spent the time laughing, chatting and catching up. it was incredible how much everything around us had changed but we hadnt. :D
then we cabbed home.
this is the part where it gets weird.
i was rather pooped when i came home. i bathed, and went online.
when i woke up, it was what, 7am and i was in my lil sis's bed! [she's at camp] it was kinda unnerving. i think i sleepwalked there. i used to when i was younger, it freaked auntie out. hahah.so i stumbled back to my room and bed
then my sister called, at like seven and asked if i could go to school and play netball. note that i was halfasleep so it sounded like a whole load of mumbo jumbo. i refused, of course.
and so im back here online.
apparently i have four appointments at 1.30 or 2- class gathering, tuition, netball match, and to the airport.
we'll see what i decide on, by prolly reading the entry that will be blogged after this one. haha.

C at 12:28 PM |
------ Monday, June 21, 2004

last night i had a really strange dream that kept me up for almost two hours.
i dreamt that mt toes, my knuckles, my ankles and the top of my foot was itching really badly, and i was semi-conscious, trying my best to relieve the itch so that i could sleep fitfully.
my efforts were futile though; went to school with eyebags that exceeded the luggage limit. honestly. ahha. i was horrified myself.
i want to lash out at someone. or rather, i need to. i need to let it out.
but i will not.
cause im not as unfeeling as some pple are.
hmm. i think im a blogaholic. i can barely fall asleep if i dont blog at least once a day.
ive done my part for today!

C at 6:13 PM |
------ Sunday, June 20, 2004

haha thanks you guys.
my friends are REALLY awesome.
:D
and no sarah, i refuse to act my age still.
haha

C at 11:19 PM |
------ Saturday, June 19, 2004

i want a 'girl girl cake' from angie's choice.
i remember how i used to spend my birthdays every yr in my gramps' flat where i spent my childhood in with my grandparents and parents.
and every year i would get that cake.
one birthday, gramps dropped it, face down flat onto the floor. he stared at me, anxious that i would start throwing a huge tanturum. but i merely shrugged it off. who could get mad at gramps,with him in his funny blue striped pajama pants.
the cake that yr was especially delicious.
it stuck a signboard onto my memory lane, and gave me sweet childhood memories.
so hence i want that cake.
or a multicoloured monogram lv wallet or anoxeria would do.
really. :D
on another note, i have scv now!! and im hooked on mtv and nickelodeon.
its like frosting in a can.

C at 10:58 PM |
------ Friday, June 18, 2004

just skimmed through barbie's blog.
and.
HOW ON EARTH COULD I HAVE allowed myself to miss the oc!!!!!!!
moan.
oh my goodness. im mega depriveddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd.
i missed the last two eps!!
how on earth did i do that!!!
wth. i know. im being punished for some random mean thing that i did.
wait. im never mean! no wait again, im digressing.
im beyond upset, and feel like kicknig myself in the shin.
how could i have missed marissa and ryan's tumultuous relationship, and how they, quote 'looked so GOOD when kissing'!!!!
and summer and marissa's beyond hot outfitS!!
and even seth's wicked humour.
this is it. now i know im obessed bout the oc.
AND I ALLOWED MYself to miss it?!
i should be shot in the head.
or maybe im just going through msn withdrawal symptoms

C at 5:36 PM |
------

BLISTERING BARNACLES!!
i cant sign in with my msn!!
there's some stupid power tussle between my msn and my windows msger.
and its driving me nuts.
now all i can do is play sims.
wheeeeeeee.
not.
fuckeroonie.
hahahaha. i think that sounds hilarious.

C at 5:23 PM |
------

i reformatted my comp.
again. haha.
but i wont do so for the longest time ever, cause its just bout perfect!!
jealous? haha.
and my hair is auburn-ish now.
when it was supposed to be strawberry blondish!!
arghhh.
now all i know is that ive been having migraines.
prolly my brain being infected by the chemicals that seeped through my scalp.
ahah. i sound intellectual dont i?
at least i tried.
and its bout what, two days left to THE day?
shrug. im not exactly looking forward to it. in fact, that day could prolly make or break my entire yr.
and i have no idea what's gonna happen on it.
come on pple, surprise the hell outta me! :D

C at 2:30 AM |
------ Tuesday, June 15, 2004

jerks. hear me?
YOU GUYS ARE ANNOYING JERKS.
retarded. im at kheng's house now using his comp, after yelling into david's ear for 15 mins to let me, the girl whose comp's been screwed for the last two days to please use it.
and i finally reached after enduring a 20 min ride with yz and david's brainless comments. and to think kenny dissed me the moment he saw me. !!!!!!!!
argh.
argh.
im speechless with exasperation and all i can say now is
ARGH.

C at 11:40 PM |
------ Monday, June 14, 2004

there. ive gone and commercialised my blog. for the time being only.
haha. i'd prolly remove all those stuffs when i change my temp. hopefully soon.
just bout 6 hrs ago, my dad was trying out my sis's crutches, pretending to be injured in the right foot like my sis; he was hopping bout and was rather confused bout which foot should be the one injured. haha. i couldnt help but wonder if the neighbours below were traumatised by the loud thuds that were coming from above.
hahahahah.
and yes. it is 5.55am in the morning now. ive tossed and turned for three whole hours before jumping out of bed and coming online in total boredom

C at 2:49 PM |
------

GUESS what!!
haha. i reformatted my comp, all by myself!!
okok.. granted i had a lil help from some tollline through my mum the first time, still!!
and twice too!!
imagine that! a bimb reformatting her comp successfully and gettng it on the net. grin. im awesome.
but why twice you'd ask. cause this dumb comp is flooded with viruses and im unable to remove them despite reformatting it twice.
oh wells.
at least it works better now.
i think.

C at 11:20 AM |
------ Sunday, June 13, 2004

im useless at the team names. but i am watching soccer afterall now.
its the portugal vs greece match. the match with the ugly dingbat for a referee who's freaking biased towards the blue team. no matter how much the blue team tackle, shove, and push the red team, he never blows them, or gives them the yellow card. the poor red team gets it all. unfair i'd say!
anyhoos. here are the pictures i so painstakingly took 1 hr to put up in imagestation. but please ignore the very first picture you'd see, cause i look like a total papayahead in that. and i usually dont. look like a papayahead, that is.
so. caution: view on an empty stomach. dont say i never warned you.

C at 1:50 AM |
------ Saturday, June 12, 2004

as i promised.
camp was good.
no doubt cause of it i have a few rants to ramble off bout. but on second thoughts. im restraining myself on that; dont wanna make some stuff worse.
and i wasnt hyped up bout going for camp. not till i reached church on sunday night. and sat with mark on the ride there.
this is going nowhere. i totally have nothing to recollect bout. but ill just do random shoutouts to pple, though some may not even see this.
eunice: hey you bimbo! we should go do our nails together soemtime! haha
jiawei: hello sexy little bitch. hhaha you did fine as a beautiful boxer.
yang: we should quit sch and go into pro bimb cheerleading! :D
pastor: its amazing how you cant lie for nuts hahah.
rachel: i honestly enjoyed chatting on the bus that night, we should def do it again. :)
mark: yesyes you scbb. you were OK only as a bus partner. ha. ha.
everyone else: you guys made my camp perfect!!
this post is going downhill into trash wonderland. maybe ill just delete it later. and i blogged a lotttt. scroll down nowwwww.

C at 7:48 PM |
------

Your Life
[x] they call me: that girl with the big mouth but awesome fashion sense. ha.
[x] gender: femaleeeee
[x] my first breath of air: soon. eight more days, 17 yrs ago.
[x] best friends: loads. but my bestest's the toilet boogeyman.

rewind
[x] most memorable memory: thailand 2004. the little little things and the little kids.
[x] worst: when i fell flat on my face in town. wince.
[x] first best friend ever: my gramps.

love
[x] love is: nonexistant.
[x] first love?: some guy in primary school.
[x] love or lust?: since love is nonexistant, it would have to be lust, wouldnt it? ;)
[x] is it possible to be in love with more than one person at a time?: no sireeeee

true or false.
[x] all u need is l0ve?: i need cash.
[x] is there such thing as love @ first sight?: dont be silly.
[x] are you in love right now?: noooooo
[x] how many times have you been in love?: i swear im gonna find the guy who created this quiz and beat him up. its so dumb it has to be a 'him'


Opposite Sex
[x] turns on: their wit
[x] do your parent's opinion on your bf/gf matter to you?: i guess.
[x] what kinda hair style?: anything he'd look good in. but he mUST have hair though.
[x] the sweetest thing a member of the opposite sex can do for you?: kiss my toes. hahaha
[x] where do you go to meet new people: wherever! i cant possibly know everyone in some places, can i?
[x] are you the type of person to HOLLER and ask for numbers: nahs

Picky Picky
[x] dog or cat: silky terrier!
[x] short or long hair: i look great in both.
[x] sunshine or rain: sunshine. i do need a tan afterall.
[x] moon or sun: sunnnnn
[x] 1 best friend or 10 acquaintances: what a silly and rhetorical question.
[x] summer or winter: summer!! esp the one in oc!! hahahaha.
[x] written letters or e-mails: letters.
[x] play station or nintendo: my mobile.
[x] car or motorcycle: i desparately need a kawasaki ninja 350!!
[x] house party or club: shrug.
[x] what song are u listening to right now?: your so damn hot by ok go.
[x] have you ever almost died?: nahs. im too gorgeous to die.
[x] how many kids do you want to have?: two sets of twins.
[x] son's name?: spartacus.
[x] daughter's name?: Ljubica. honestly. pronunouced as yu-vit-za.
[x] how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?: why the hell would i be eating that?
[x] what do you like most of the opposite sex?: their wit. i think.
[x]Personality: huh?
[x] do others find you attractive?: no ideaa.
[x] Haf anyone in mind?: without a doubt yeaahhhh baby!
[x] Who is it?: the gorgeous daniel!! hahaha he's incredibly gorgeous!
[x] School?: wth. what an anticlimax.

C at 7:32 PM |
------

i wanted to send my comp into rehab, and since without my comp, there was no way to justify my existence, i hence decided to send myself off for a church camp.
and i did. from 7-11th, monday till friday.
i just got back two hours ago.
but i forgot to arrange rehab for my comp. so its still cranky.
anyhoos. camp was good. i think.
like my msn nick currently would say : too much drama, too little time.
and im good at playing murderder, the polar bear versh. and ive only played it 11 times!! :D
and i fell in love with gorgeous daniel!!
but wait. i guess ill blog more tml, cause its late, im pooped, and ive yet to bath for the entire dayyyy.
when i get clean and enervated, id sound more intellectual. i am! i really am.
so. laters

C at 1:37 AM |
------ Friday, June 04, 2004

i want to take the train to commonwealth, and saunter my way down the rotten old track into this crummy old school.
and make my way up to the second level, and enter the classroom with the black and white painted bricks with shades to block out the sunlight so we can sleep in class better. :D
and hear kheng kp-ing or going 'jeng jeng jeng'
and watch our inefficient class chairman flirt with his girl
and wince at yf, cs, michelle's and py's shrieks of mad laughter
and grin at the snoozing kenny, huihua and christy.
and silently smirk at cheryl and emileen gazing into the ohp's mirror.
and just wind my way into my seat at the artic zone, and know that that is where i belong.
but a stark realisation keeps striking me in the heart, and doesnt give me the chance to delude myself.
cause now where i am, im miserable, i stick out like a sore thumb. or even worse - im invisible.
i would never let go of this memories i have, even to move on, cause to do so means i'd be losing a huge part of me

C at 12:42 AM |
------ Thursday, June 03, 2004

top three stuffs on my wishlist
1. anoxeria
2. three whole bottles of sleeping pills.
3. prozac.
4. and possibly jelly that dont bounce off walls, like the ones my maid made and im eating right bout now.

C at 2:36 PM |
------ Wednesday, June 02, 2004

came home an hour ago
after doing 3.2km in total of interval trgs with sarah and cs. man it felt quite good. haha 'it releases endorphins mah' to quote sarah. honestly she's sooo turning into a chink. hahaha.
and then i went to undo all my running by eating loads of cheese prata and stuff. im quite pooped now. and i cant think straight.
oh. i just realised i forgot to put the java script to protect my blog entries. so pple, before i put it in mega soon, my blog entries are ffa -- free for all. ahah. yeaps. they are that desirable i guess.
anyways, im gonna blog to sarah today. sarah.short. hahah. so now everyone pretty much knows who.
you've been awesome. yes, i know you know that, but still. lol. thanks loads for being my friend.
you better continue being so. :D
and sarah.tall. yes yr equally great. man. i think im mucking around in some mess im creating.
my brain's all mush now. toodles.
and i blogged quite a bit these few days. scroll down to read 'em. now.

C at 1:52 AM |
------ Tuesday, June 01, 2004

as i was waiting at the train interchange today, i kinda spaced out, watching everyone alighting from the train and brushing past me.
when out of the blue, this old lady in powder green suitlike dress came to me, whacked me with her matching moss green paper bag and chided me rather loudly in cantonese: sit wrongly lah!!! sit over there instead!! and she used her silly bag to point to a seat next to me.
more astonished than angry, i simply stared at her, dumbfounded, watching her sashay away while my mind worked out a few comebacks in cantonese, my first one being (in canto of course, i can so speak it. brokenly.): where else would i sit if not here?!
other alternatives popped out along:
1.qi seen ahh! (nutcase)
2.what right do you have to hit me with yr silly bag?! cant i sit where i want!?
3.what on earth are you hitting me for?!
and my personal fave: tiu le lo mo. (hahaha. no way am i translating that)
but when i got out of my daze, she had already gone on her lil green way down the escalator while i scowled and sulked incessantly.
why do i always come up with the best comebacks only after the actual moment? honestly im still miffed bout the entire incident, and with the mean green monster.
and my birthday is in 19 days!!! woohoo. im totally on a blogging roll! lol.

C at 12:37 AM |
------ hits. since 041104